66 Phillips St, Beacon Hill, Boston – 2:20 AM Wed 23 Aug 67
A most comfortable and peaceful morning in Genevieve & Kent’s apt. Genevieve went to sleep already because she has to get to her job at a dept. store candy counter in the city’s poorest section by 11:15 AM. Kent and I do no work at all, we loaf around the apt and get into endless, pointless philosophical discussions. We are currently on What Forms the Personality. He maintains the tabula rasa theory – I was Gen Westmoreland’s daughter I would be a rabid militaristic chauvinist. Oh, so there are no ideas that are more inherently correct than other ideas. Yes, of course there are. So dot dot dot. I draw in constant examples from history – Frederick the Great’s flute playing son – which he can’t refute because he doesn’t know. He’s not used to people putting up this much of an argument apparently. Genevieve seems well and happy. Kent is tender, imaginative and appears to care for her deeply. I can’t take “sides” – Mom thinks its hurtful to have a parent-less wedding – she refused consent – Dad had to give it) and Genevieve thinks Mom treats casual guests better than the “trip” she laid on them that weekend. So who was wrong first? It does seem like parents are the chicken and kids are the eggs – therefore parents should keep what tempers they have. I’m now lying on my pullout couch trying to read Romain Gary’s The Ski Bum. I think I understand him too well. Am trying to construct a Gary novel in my head that is more interesting than this one. It would have at least one murder and a lot of Simenonesque interrogations: “How did you know he was a boy?” “From the way he walked.” “You are a very good witness. What was he wearing?” “I don’t remember.” The sky is just starting to lighten. Discovered that if you step to the end of the hall and lift the screen you can climb right out to the wet roof. I seem bothered by a lot of poltergeists, ghosts and flying saucers that never troubled me before. I’m afraid once they get a toehold they’re with you for good. Kent and I are 98% certain we saw a flying saucer over Boston Common. We gave chase it but it departed. (We may have been influenced by just seeing Those Magnificent Men in their Flying Machines.) This ghosts, according to Genevieve, is an earring thief. Well, he could climb that tree and get right in is all I’m saying. I should write about Dan Devereux but I am becoming incoherent. Seems like I’ve seen a lot of sunrises lately. Junior Wells tomorrow night! Approx. 1:30 AM Thurs, 31 Aug 67 I always consider it my fault if a date is not a success but some dates don’t give you much to work with. My date with Dan started out the worst possible way – I missed my train and was an hour late. Had to walk down Penn St to the Queen Lane station in black Vanellis and rust and green chiffon through the worst neighborhood you can possibly think of but nobody did anything worse than catcalling. Then because I’d missed the train had to sit in the station alone! On the Main Line end found Dan peering up the stairwell like a little boy – looking so cute. We played Botticelli in the cab on the way to the restaurant – it was his idea! I was JP Morgan and although he is pretty quick he didn’t get it. So I should like this guy – why don’t I? Is it because he dated Casey? Maybe I know him too well (third hand!) Keep having visions of his & Casey’s elbows & underpants flying! The Tony George is a romantic restaurant with excellent food but we were almost alone – nobody came in. I am used to galloping in & out but we sat there at least 2 hours. I had clams, flounder stuffed with crabmeat and 5 cups of coffee. Anxiety poured off Dan – infecting me with its sticky mange - God knows why. Afterwards we walked along the river. Finally showed up at the movie – Citizen Kane. I didn’t like it because I didn’t like Kane. I feel the movie doesn’t want you to like him so ho hum. The sled thing is idiotic like the punch line of an endless shaggy dog story. Afterwards we went to Dan’s townhouse on Society Hill – it was built 1801 and he is very worked up about it as if it was just about to vanish. All I can say is, you can’t buy taste. His parents and little sister were in bed. He fixed us both scotches but I said I preferred a gin and tonic. He said they were out! I will never get used to scotch. He worships John Coltrane, put on a record, took off his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. Men look much handsomer partially undressed. He has a very pretty chest. Then he started lecturing me about how I pick boys with no experience so I can dominate them. (Won’t Aiken be surprised to hear! ) I said I really don’t know what I’m searching for – I’m young and I’m playing it by ear. Then Dan told me awful things about Reed! Said I almost destroyed him! I said that CAN’T be true and brought up Marnie. No, no, no, says Dan she’s nothing. I’d try to be flattered if he wasn’t trying to actually make me feel bad. Shawn also supposedly loved me – now that I DON’T believe! Me – galumphing me! Apparently the more boys try to destroy a girl the more they like her. This is giving me a new perspective on things. I am out of patience with being liked. Dan said I am eminently “watchable”. I explained how I danced all summer and am starting to feel like maybe I can actually do it. He couldn’t believe we cancaned for nuns! Life is strange. He talked me out of catching the 12:30 last train by saying he’d walk me from the all night trolley, got me a pair of his sister’s shirt and jeans and we went out to see the sunrise. (Mom and Dad not home – houseguests only. Why worry?) Rainy and overcast – no sunrise to see! So went to the Melrose Diner where we had steak for breakfast. What with the trolley, subway and train situation we didn’t reach Penn St till 10:30 AM and everyone had gone. I made hamburgers for lunch then I sent Dan home, had a boiling hot bath and went to bed. He held my hands ONCE and brushed my lips with his ONCE. This has to be part of a game. I wouldn’t expect anyone but you to believe it!! Houseguest Jeff came back – promised NEVER TO TELL – in fact to perjure his soul for me. Pretty sure he doesn’t believe nothing happened. However now Dan can tell everyone he spent the night with me! Is 19 hours a “first date” record?
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Alysse Aallyn
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